
Have you ever felt like crying so badly, the tears won’t even flow?
OK, rewind: it was a Sunday morning and I stared in shock at my laptop screen. I had a funny feeling that my writing client was trying to skip out on paying my invoice.
He’d shown signs of bailing on me a few days earlier, but he claimed that he’d keep his word and pay me as we’d previously discussed.
Although my gut warned me that I probably had a rat on my hands, my memory reminded me that the fellow behaved like a reliable gentleman during our first transaction together. Still, I braced myself for the worst and sure enough, the worst took place. The client coldly and arrogantly informed me that my invoice would not be paid and that I should have no issue with finding other sources of work elsewhere.
I was now short hundreds of dollars and oh yeah, three of my bills, including my rent, were due within a few days!
Has anything like this ever happened to you? Maybe you’ve dealt with a client that left you feeling spent, dizzy, tired and shocked. If this has happened more than once, you might ask yourself why this keeps happening to you…again and again. You might ask yourself if you’ve missed signs, if you spelled everything out to the client in the beginning. You might question if you were naive in any way.
Don’t feel bad.

You’re not alone and the good news is, there is a way for you to keep these toxic client relationships from happening again. I’ll let you in on a secret: It’s my firm belief that the laws of business and the laws of love often overlap.
In the same way that you can learn to apply “loser repellent” to your love life, you can do it for your professional life!
If you want to learn how to keep losers away from your freelance blogging career, try these tips from the laws of love:
Create a Barrier to Entry
If your upfront payment price-points are too inexpensive, you’ll allow any Tom/Dick/Harry to reach out to you! Hey, you know how it is for us writers. We’re so insecure about being rejected, we offer our services too cheaply or too easily. We’re too accommodating!
Yeah, raising your fees and upfront payment percentage, etc. will send some clients scampering away. That’s exactly what you want to have happen. Trust me, the ones who are serious about paying, can afford to pay and respect your craft will stick around. These are the clients who are worthy of your time and efforts—the ones you’ll want to “marry” with a long-term blogging contract.
Be Specific About Your Expectations
When a loser client understands that you have strict standards of operation, especially around payments, they’ll slink away. Low-balling, shifty clients will know that you’re not playing their games!
Stop Setting Yourself Up to Get Hurt
This means that you need to stop prioritizing your client’s needs and agendas above your own. Know this: the client will never care about your needs (for example your need to eat, or to pay bills) more than their own. Therefore, never count on the client’s “promised payment” to cover your bills.
If you gain nothing else from this post, learn this: If you have no financial savings or if you’re just starting out, work on your client’s projects in your spare time. DO NOT stop performing your everyday work, no matter how much you may hate it. As you earn more money from your freelancing side business, you can replace some of your daily work with freelance client work. But NEVER, EVER replace guaranteed money with promised money.
Speaking of not getting screwed, make your clients earn the right to be treated with priority. They can earn this right by paying your fees without arguments or drama, on time. They’ll make your working relationship a joy, not a burden!
Value Yourself and Your Abilities
Just as you might assess what makes you a worthy romantic “catch”, you need to take inventory of what makes you worthy of the respect and the premium fees that a freelance writer deserves. It shouldn’t take you long—considering your life experiences, your previous professional background, your education and your talents—to realize that your clients are receiving a lot of value!
How often do you base your fees on how many keystrokes you can type in an hour or worse, how much money you used to get paid per hour? When is the last time that you’ve taken inventory of all of your professional skills, your personal skills, your education, your “street smarts”, etc.? Do you realize that all of these play a part when you create a project for your clients?
You can get closure on all of those crappy, toxic client relationships you’ve experienced. You might even decide to put a stop on the type of work you are currently selling, especially if it’s causing you stress and it isn’t working for you.
In your romantic life, you’ve learned that when you focus on obtaining the right type of partnerships, you’ll avoid a lot of the drama. The same absolutely holds true in your professional life!
Image: fractured-fairytales
Experience really IS the cruelest teacher.
You always get the punishment before you
learn the lesson.
Don’t feel bad, Terri. We’ve all been there.
It was just as painful for us as it was for you.
Cardinal Rule #1: Never quote fees right up front.
Every client’s needs are different, so what you
charge should reflect this fact.
Cardinal Rule #2: Professionals get paid in advance
before work begins. If you give your client the impression
that you’ll start work for nothing, that’s exactly what
you’ll get at the end. And as Terri so aptly pointed out,
“nothing” doesn’t pay the bills!
The more you conduct yourself like the CEO of your business,
the more likely clients will treat you that way. True, clients do
hire writers for projects. But you’re not the “hired help.” And
most importantly, you don’t cost clients money like an expense.
You make them money that flows to their bottom line. Let your
actions demonstrate this fact, and the chances of you getting
stiffed on fees will shrink dramatically.
Very nice job, Terri. I don’t believe I’ve read your work
on Sophie’s blog before, so hopefully she’ll invite you back. 🙂
Thanks Michael. I’d be glad to pitch Sophie again if she’d let me :). And great input about not allowing ourselves to be treated like the “hired help”. I’ve experienced that too many times as a writer. This is especially common with “mom and pop” bloggers who (You can tell) have never hired anyone professionally before. Real professionals “get” it.
Great post Terri!
One of the reasons why I put some estimated rates on my page is so that the low balling clients don’t even bother to contact me asking me for “bulk work” articles at $5 a pop.
I guess a big part of the problem is the fear of not having anything better (just like relationships!), and not knowing your self worth.
Do I take the sleazy lover(client) who will offer me a few scattered minutes of pleasure but hours of heartache? Or do I hold out in hopes of getting better sometime in the uncertain future?
If you don’t know your worth, and don’t have faith in yourself, then your more likely to take that low balling client.
But sometimes you have to hold out for what you’re worth!
Great business and life advice to live by, Daryl!
Great post. You have to know your value before you begin. Know what you bring to the table and you can negotiate the rest. Freelancing isn’t easy, but if you treat it like it’s an easy job, then you’ll be treated like an easy lay.
We do teach others how to treat us in life and in business, don’t we?
Can you tell us the rest of the story? Does the client just get away with it and you learn a lesson for another day?
Hi Susan,
To answer your question, yeah, the client did get away with it. There was nothing that I could do, especially since the so-called client lives in Australia! (I was thrilled to “go” international for a moment though, lol).
But isn’t that what life is about? We experience things and we learn tons of lessons for another day. If we get the opportunity, we pass our lessons on to others.
You know, my life turned out okay after this incident. The bills got paid that month and I’m still paying them. I gained the opportunity to turn my life experience into a story. I grew as a business person, as a writer and in my personal vulnerability. On the other hand, this joker lost a great content writer for his affiliate review site. Now, his content will look disjointed, uneven and uninspiring.
Overall, I think that I came out the winner!
Really sorry to hear that happened but you still have options.
Since you weren’t paid, that work is yours. Since that work is yours, you can most likely crucify him with DCMAs and the sort, including those sent to Google. Since affiliate reviews sites tend to get a great deal of traffic from Google… At the very least you can make sure he isn’t stealing your work and using it to make more money.
At the very least, you can be very annoying though you’ll never recover the hours you put on it. But you can always use it for your portfolio once he has had to remove it from his site 🙂
Hi Erinwyn,
To clarify, the client paid me for the first part of the project. The problem took place when he sent me the specs for the second part of the project and promised to pay the invoice I sent for the second portion. Then after playing games for a few days, he pulled the rug out from under me and completely cancelled.
Meaning, I didn’t start the second part of the project, since he didn’t pay my invoice. But I was counting on money promised. As you can read above, lessons learned.
As far as starting a war with him, why bother? It’s enough for me to know that he ruined a good thing for himself. I don’t care what happens to him and anyway, the time spent on revenge could be spent finding better clients and better opportunities.
Another thing that life has taught me is how and when to let go of issues. 😉
Oh sorry, I misunderstood. I thought the client had stolen (as in got your work, and didn’t pay you) which I think is something way too many writers take on the chin, which is a bad habit. Because even if it’s virtual content, stealing is stealing.
Not counting eggs until they’re on the basket, however, is really sound advice.
Love this one! “Creating a barrier to entry” is great advice. One of the oddest things about freelancing is that the more you raise your rates the less trouble you have getting paid. That’s the difference between working with “we’re just starting out, and we don’t have much money” amateurs, as opposed to “we’re already there, and we know esactly what our budget is” professionals.
Esactly? Clearly I meant exactly. Having one of those days where I do my best proofreading after I hit send 🙂
No worries about the typo, Karen. Thanks for your comment.
Hi Terri,
It’s true some of the clients won’t pay the invoice in proper time. These days after the advent of micro niche sites freelance writing took a good boom on the other hand sites like fivver gave people the ability to get freelancers for as low as $5 and some even write for $2 and this does really affect people who want to take freelance writing. I was offered $8 to $20 for writing articles for a blog, at one stage I wanted to accept it as I was badly in need of bucks. But I did not accept the offer as you have said client’s won’t care about our needs but as a freelancer we do see that the article we write does have the essence the client needs. I still am not a freelance writer as the payment would not cover my bills, so I just stayed close to some affiliate products which does require less attention once they are properly placed over the net.
I still know people make good money by freelance writing, I will some how get good and valuable clients one day who really like my writing and pay accordingly. After reading this article I felt I am not alone as you mentioned “Value Yourself and Your Abilities”, so even if it takes time I believe I shouldn’t get hired by wrong clients.
I am impressed by Sophie’s eBook where she did give some good list of sites where people pay more than 50$ an article, I tried few but was rejected as they did not meet the quality guidelines but still one day will be mine. Thanks for your beautiful article which did cover some good facts.
Vijesh,
In any industry, there will always be people looking to obtain the cheapest labour possible.
Likewise, there will always be people willing to pay decent wages to those who can produce quality work.
The trick is to ignore the first type of client and actively seek the second.
Cheers,
Daryl
Daryl is right, Vijesh. There will always be people looking to get work done for cheap–but they aren’t the only clients out there.
Don’t let a few bad eggs ruin your outlook. You CAN make a living from freelance writing.
And rejection is something every freelance writer has to face. Even established writers who have been in the business for years will get rejected from time to time.
If this is what you really want to do, then keep trying!
keeping your employer stick the terms of deal with you as freelancer is a risky venture and you first need to be strictly formal with him to get maximum surety of all your payments both advance and final ones. If you do any weak contact that is will disturb you do your job perfectly and eventually it will impact your future business. So we must tackle such issues very carefully
It’s always important to maintain a professional manner no matter who you’re dealing with in your business.
As for getting your client to stick to the terms of your deal? The easiest way to make sure that happens is to make sure you have a contract! Never work without a contract.
My lovely fiance (who is a much better person than I) has two words tattooed on her: “Sweet Catastrophe.”
The happiest people in the world seem to be those who can take the ups and downs of life as opportunities to learn instead of some force they are up against.
Every step we take forward is another chance to learn what drives our passions, and if we are brave enough to follow our dreams we can be happy and successful, even in the face of the unknown.
Yep. Freelancing success is all about you and how YOU decide to handle situations–particularly when things go wrong.
I’ve been fortunate enough to never have had this happen, but I’m always a bit nervous that it’s coming. I’d be really interested to hear about the “signs of bailing” that you reference early on in the post. I have no idea if it would be obvious to me.
Also, I really like your point about creating barriers—it’s really easy to low-ball on bids because we’re afraid of getting rejected. This is actually something I’ve been thinking about quite a bit lately. I’m really nervous about pricing people out of my services, even though I just got done with a contract that took exponentially more effort than I got paid for.
I’m thinking about writing a post on writers and self-value / -worth and such, and this has given me quite a bit to think about. Thanks for a great post!
Hey, Daniel!
I’m actually planning to write a blog post on freelancers getting ripped off by clients (it happens to EVERY freelancer at some point), but here are a few warning flags off the top of my head:
* The client asks for “samples.” Very rarely is this legitimate. Most “potential clients” who ask for free samples are just suckering you into doing free work. (And some will even resell the articles you’ve written!)
* They ask you to work “on spec.”
* They refuse to sign your contract. (Never EVER work without a contract).
* They won’t pay your advance. Always get at least SOME of your money up front. Personally, I like to get ALL of the money up front, but, if that’s not feasible, I always get at LEAST 50% up front. If they’re willing to pay the first 50%, they’re usually good for the last 50% after the project is finished.
* They ask you for a consultation…and it goes on FOREVER and leads to nothing. I offer free mini-consultations on my website (littlezotz.com), but I always make sure they’re just that: Mini. If someone asks you for a “consultation” and they talk to you at length with no sign of hiring you–they’re probably not GOING to hire you. They’re just after the free advice.
* They ask for too much personal info. It sounds weird, but some “clients” are actually people running a phishing scam. Clients don’t need to know every last detail about you–and there’s a lot they probably SHOULDN’T know.
* They want YOU to pay THEM for work. Sounds ridiculous, right? But it’s an easier trap to fall into than you may think. There are some legitimate job boards that require you to pay a fee to use them (The Freelance Writer’s Den or some of LinkedIn’s premium features), but most of the time this is going to be someone trying to sucker you. Always double-check the source.
* They’re never satisfied. This could just be a jerk client who’s trying to exert power over you just to get their “money’s worth” out of you… But if a client keeps asking for rewrites to the point that the project has morphed into something entirely new, then they’re probably trying to get double the work out of you for half the pay.
* They’re a “start-up” that’s going to “hit it big” and they “promise” that they’ll give you a “percentage of the profits/stock in the company/whatever” once they really get things rolling. Uh-huh. Be polite to this person in case they actually DO succeed–but say “no” until they actually have the money to pay you what you’re worth.
* They want you to write for “exposure.” As Linda Formichelli recently said in one of her Morning Motivation e-mails: “People DIE from exposure!” So true. Avoid this “client.”
* They want to rush everything. This person is probably used to paying people by the hour. So they figure if they make you rush through everything they won’t have to pay you as much. Bottom line? People who are always in a rush don’t understand that GOOD work takes time–and costs money.
* Their e-mail is poorly written. This is a fine line and you’ll need to go with your gut. Often people who need to hire writers aren’t the best writers themselves… But if it seems like they barely understand what writing IS, then they’re probably not someone you want to work with. It’s harder to explain your value to someone who doesn’t know what it is you’re selling.
* They’re mean/disrespectful to you right off the bat. You don’t need to take that crap. I wrote about this here: http://littlezotz.com/2013/09/v-is-for-vending-machine-mentality
* There’s no info about the “client” anywhere. If they’re a legitimate business, they should have SOMETHING about them either online or offline that checks out. A website, a LinkedIn profile, a phone number in the Yellow Pages…SOMETHING.
* They avoid communication. If they’re doing this to you before you even start working with them, then they’re only going to get worse when money is involved.
* They say the work they have for you is “easy.” If they think it’s easy, then they’re going to expect you to do it on the cheap. It’s a sign they don’t respect–or fully understand–what it is you do.
And…that’s all I can think of off the top of my head. Those are all of the ones that I’ve run into personally. But I’m sure Terri has a few of her own that she could add to the list. 🙂
Hope that was helpful, if a tad long.
Hmm, I definitely ‘replaced guaranteed money with promised money’ back when I was first starting out… Sometimes it works out (as some clients are lovely, decent human beings) and sometimes it comes around and bites you on the proverbial! Like you say in your reply to Susan above though – these are all good lessons we learn. Thankfully readers of this post won’t have to learn it the hard way now. 🙂
So true, Kirsty! Thank goodness people like the writers here at BAFB are willing to share their traumatic client experiences in order to save future freelancers from getting burned the same way. 😉
Glad you’ve stopped replacing “guaranteed money with promised money.” Thanks for commenting!
I found this when looking for info about Terri Scott. She does not practice what she preaches. She hired writers and did not pay them. When pressured to pay a measly $54, she lost her mind. Do not support this writer, she’s as bad as those that she attacks.
In a rare act of censorship, I’ve deleted the rest of your lengthy comment because you say you’re quoting from a private email conversation. Publishing private emails in public without the sender’s permission is generally not cool, even if you’re pissed off with somebody. Wikileaks does that type of thing; I don’t.
If you have a genuine problem with Terri, I hope it gets resolved. But this is not the right way or the right place to communicate about it.
Sophie,
Since you addressed this in pubic, I’ll say this
in public:
I appreciate the way you handled this situation.
Contrary to popular belief, doing things the right
way really DOES matter. Terri is a top-shelf
writer and an even better person. And yes,
anyone who has a beef with her should do
as you suggested.
Michael
My goodness! I’m away for 2 days and just look what happens! 😉
Thanks for taking this one, Sophie.
Hi Terr…
17 years ago I left a bad relationship and started my online business at the same time — (to support my daughter) — so I get the analogy you’re making of business/relationships.
In my early days I used to get low ball offers, and I got stiffed more than a few times. Being a single Mom, that hurt, as you know.
But 17 years down the road, I see a few things I didn’t see in the early days. Thought I’d share some of them.
1) I learned that most relationships (personal & work) are seldom a case of lousy people vs good people, but expectation & compatibility.
I’m sure someone is suited to my ex. Just not me. (lol) There’s lots of people overseas that are over the moon to get $5 or $10 for an article. Why not find a couple of them and when someone lowballs you, nicely say you don’t work for that rate, but here’s a couple of writers overseas that do. Some will thank you. Others will raise their eyebrows and agree to your rate. You get karma points either way…
2) I learned that my clients don’t set the tone for how my business is run, I do. So I started billing up front. When I got brave enough to double my rates, I found that the quality of my work improved. Raising my rates made me mentally bring my A-game every time, which helped bring in even better clients. Esteem affects the relationships we attract, both business & personal.
3) And, once I realized that I wasn’t getting stiffed (payment up front) and I wasn’t getting poorly matched clients (I referred them away) I discovered I really, really enjoyed the people I was working with. And then the “post-toxic-relationship” wariness and cynicism faded into history and I discovered I was doing work I’m proud of for people I truly, truly enjoy. And that’s a pretty awesome place to be.
Also? Pick your 3 best clients. Tell them if they know anyone who could use a copywriter, you’d sure appreciate a referral. If good people with compatible work standards are spreading your name around, good things tend to follow.
Hang in there – perseverance is power. 🙂
Perseverance is a huge part of successful freelance writing, to be sure! 🙂
And I love your “Pick your 3 best clients” suggestion. The clients that come as referrals from my best/favorite clients always tend to be more in line with what I’m looking for.
Thanks for reading!
I think it’s great that you are staying so positive about the whole situation! Instead of letting it get you down, you’re moving right along onto bigger and better things. Thanks for the positivity. 🙂
Thank you Alexandra for your kind words. I wanted to take a moment to thank everyone who has supported my post. I also want to take the time to publicly apologize for the bad post that the so-called “Susie-Q” posted.
In short, this person was someone that I hired and displayed behavior that was extremely off the charts, both personally and professionally. I had to let this person “go” and this is the result.
This post was intended to help writers to help themselves. I’m very much a person who is honest about my victories and failings, if my experiences will help others to help themselves. I’m very grateful that Sophie gave me this opportunity to share my experiences and I hope to be able to do so again.
I don’t know about kids in the U.K. but here in the States, it’s common for a kid to scream “abuse” to authorities when they are angry with their parents. This person I hired, the so-called “Susie-Q” is behaving like a child having a temper-tantrum and then screaming “abuse”. I’m deeply sorry that Sophie and you, the readers, were exposed to this.
I have contacted local authorities where this person lives and they are handling the situation, even as I type this. I don’t take to being bullied very well, nor should anyone! Again, thank you everyone for chiming in on what has been mostly, a very positive and thoughtful posting experience.
No worries, Terr. In a way, this situation meshed perfectly with your post! It was a bad break-up coming back to bite you in the butt. 😉
We’re all grown-ups here. We can handle it.
Your post is wonderful and we’d love for you to write for BAFB again in the future.
Awww, I’m sorry this great post and insightful comments got hampered by a troll. These are great tips for new writers and those new to love. Brilliant!
I will add to not pour your entire life into one person – just like you need space and your personal life to be somewhat separate in a relationship, continue to market yourself and seek other clients!!
I really liked this post as well! As someone who had my fair share of gosh-awful relationships (“romantic” and professional) before finally getting it right, I could totally relate. haha.
By the way, I think a similar article would work well on your own blog. I’m sure there are several “lessons” you’ve learned being a part of an interracial marriage that would translate to your freelancing experiences. (For example, as someone in an interracial relationship myself, I’ve learned to grow a thicker skin and not give a crap about what people think of my passions–both for my man and my business).
Just a thought. 😉
Great analogy, Terri — and thanks everybody for all the useful input. Smart post, Sophie.
Glad you approve, Roy. 🙂 Thanks for continuing to be a reader!
Hi Terri,
I love how you applied the principles of love to working with clients. As a therapist, I agree with you – we writers need to put ourselves first because we need to teach others how to treat us. Unfortunately, clients burn us when we let them. Great post! Heiddi
Great take charge attitude, Heiddi! 🙂
This is an amazing and informative post. I’ve been there as a novice freelance writer. Now that I’ve some experience under my belt, I’m a lot more careful who I (figuratively) climb into bed with! Since I have a part-time job, I can afford to let the rats go find a different place to scrabble over.
My work prior to going professional was for friends, acquaintances and friends-of-friends (and spanned about a dozen years or more). In 2011, when I started asking for money, most quit asking for products.
Three asked for projects and promised payment on my ridiculously LOW quotes. For example, I quoted $50 for a 6-panel / 2 folds brochure. After endless revisions, it took me something close to 20 hours to create it. When they refused to pay, they acted like it was my fault that I wanted money for the work because I hadn’t in years prior. Plus gave insults for even thinking I was “professional enough” to ask for payment.
In the end, I forgave the debts and dropped the subject of those particular projects. I’ve since made it clear since that I write professionally, which includes professional rates and 50% payment before I begin.
One is still a great friend, but doesn’t ask for anything unless she’s going to pay for it. The others have sidled out of my immediate circle. They each asked once more for something, then acted betrayed – and accused me of being greedy – when I quoted a real price.
All the lessons that you – and Lauren Tharp – have said.
Oooooh… Sorry to hear about your “friends.” 🙁
But good for you for sticking to your guns!
Just keep at it. You’ve got the right attitude. All you need now are clients who respect you! 😉
By the way, I actually did end up turning that crazy long comment I left into a blog post on my site! http://littlezotz.com/2013/10/client-red-flags/ Haha. What can I say? This place is inspirational!
Good luck out there. And thanks for reading/commenting! <3
😀 I thought they sounded familiar! I read that post – and promptly put it in my “Particularly Useful” folder.
Haha. Well, thank you very much! I’m so happy you not only found them useful, but *particularly* useful! 😀
Hm, interesting.
But, even though I know what you mean because I read the internet – I can’t relate.
Maybe you guys should date like we do. Or rather, date like you take clients.
As in, date to marry, after you’ve already done background checks on the other person. Decent, not a criminal, similar interests, similar background, similar life goals (not one person who wants to live in New York, and one who wants to go help kids in Africa), etc.
It doesn’t sound too romantic, but it sure does save you the headache and heartache of a bad romantic relationship (which, FTR, I’ve never had. Thank G-d, and may I never have reason to date again).