You the Boss: “You gave your word. You have to send out 3 queries by the end of today. Now get off Facebook.”
You the Employee: “Yeah I know, but I can always do it tomorrow.”
You the Boss: “You’ve said that for a week!”
Does this sound familiar? We promise ourselves, and our ‘boss’ selves, that we’ll do it… tomorrow… tomorrow… tomorrow….
The hardest thing we do as freelance writers is navigate the role of boss and employee. We have to step up.
The best way to act as both is by conveying respect, motivation and encouragement.
Respect
If you had a boss other than yourself, you wouldn’t dare tell them you’ll do something tomorrow. Show your ‘boss’ self some respect. When you say you’re going to do something, do it.
Motivation
In an office setting, the boss is watching you. Everyone around you is in work mode. Nobody takes a break until a specified time.
These are psychological triggers that keep you motivated. When they’re not there, you’re not so motivated. So make your own at your home office.
Here are some examples of my psychological triggers:
- Plant the Butt: I think about my girls who are at school and have to stay in their seats for 55 minutes at a time. If they can do this, so can I.
- Ride the Wave: After my scheduled break, I tackle some of the easier things. Before long, several small things are accomplished, which then triggers more motivation to push and do more.
- Blank Screen Syndrome: Always start with HOW, WHEN & WHY. This is almost fail-proof and triggers ideas.
- Guilt Trip Prevention: Stick to what the boss self wants done so when it comes time to ‘clock out’ the boss isn’t laying guilt trips!
Encouragement
You aren’t programmed to encourage yourself. We have no problem encouraging our co-workers or our family, but we’ve learned to find self-encouragement uncomfortable.
Accept in your head that it’s not YOU, but rather your boss encouraging you. Now, as the boss, be honest and give praise where it’s due!
You Can’t Pull a Rabbit Out of Your Butt
A blank schedule subconsciously tells the brain that there’s time to meander through e-mails or respond to silly Facebook posts.
Guilt ensues and you start to come up with some quickie IPA (income producing activity) that will make up for lost time. It’s like trying to pull that rabbit out of your butt — it just can’t be done.
In the meantime, you’re beating yourself up over why in the world you didn’t plan today, yesterday. [Why didn’t you, by the way?]
Now you-the-boss says to stop wasting time and get to work.
But you-the-worker says, “You’re not the boss of me!” And to demonstrate this, you stubbornly continue goofing off while, inside, your boss self is enraged.
It’s a vicious cycle.
Tit for Tat Syndrome
Your boss self and your employee self are playing games that result in a lack of trust and respect, as explained in an article on Brainpickings:
Consider the following: two well-intentioned people adopt the TFT strategy for deciding whether to be cooperative with each other. All goes well for a while, but then one of these unintended slights occurs. Person A believes that Person B “defected” on her (whether defection here means intentionally revealing a secret, skimming profits, not working hard enough, etc.), when in actuality Person B’s behavior was accidental (i.e., she didn’t intend to act in an untrustworthy manner). Assuming they both adhere to TFT, the death spiral begins.
This tit-for-tat game between your boss self and your employee self completely disconnects your brain and heart. You need to get back on track fast. Here’s how in 3 simple steps:
1. Plan Tomorrow TODAY!
Write down the things your boss self wants done. Prioritize them. Pick two things to do first thing tomorrow morning. List the steps of how you’re going to do these two things.
2. The Pooper Scooper
Clean up your crap. Take a few minutes and clear off your workspace. A de-cluttered work space produces a de-cluttered brain.
3. Tricks for Staying Focused
It’s all about the brain/heart connection:
- Get into the zone. This is a state of mind where your heart and your brain are aligned so that you are able to be productive. Focus on how, when and why.
- No negative self-talk. It is a proven fact that the mind can only process one thought at a time. The heart listens to the mind, and vice versa. Keep them aligned so they work with each other and not against each other.
- Balanced emotion. Sometimes tunnel vision is a good thing. It’s important that you be able to avoid information overload. Just look at the first step, then the second, etc.
The Emergency Tool: CH-CH-CHING!
CH-CH-CHING resembles the sound you hear on a cash register, which symbolizes income. There are 3 steps to this emergency tool all starting with ‘Ch.’ The idea is to reel your brain back into an “income producing” state of mind. So try these simple things:
1. Chunk your time
Choose a project that needs your attention and plant yourself for 50 minutes.
For most people, it takes about 15 minutes just to get to that ‘in the zone’ frame of mind. Really focus on your task. Before you know it, 50 minutes is up! Walk away for 10 to 20 minutes and reward yourself.
2. Chat
The idea is to chat productively. So stick to ‘business mode.’
Retweet or share some relevant articles your followers would appreciate. Are you anticipating guest blogging for anyone? Place a comment on their most recent blog post or share their content.
Tweet/Share/Pin links to a few of your most recent blog posts.
3. Check
Check tomorrow’s schedule, queries, your social media calendar, HARO for sources on an upcoming article and check on clients.
So, now let me ask you again: Who made YOU the boss?
Ultimately, YOU did.
With stringent office policies and rigid office structure to keep you in line, you are the boss of you.
Now make it worth it. Be a good boss and a good employee. You can do it!
Joy says
“Does this sound familiar? We promise ourselves, and our ‘boss’ selves, that we’ll do it… tomorrow… tomorrow… tomorrow….”
I’m guilty of this. For the past few days that I haven’t checked much items on my to do list. Okay, boss mode: ON!
Lynn Silva says
Great attitude Joy. You’re a wonderful writer and you’ll learn to navigate both rolls very well. : ) The wonderful thing about ‘off’ days is that when you have one, you can start all over the next day.
Rob McNelis says
I takes a lot of self discipline to be your own boss. I think you could say that most people don’t have what it takes. It’s harsh, but true. People need to get motivated.
Lynn Silva says
Yes Rob! That’s the key: motivation. But navigating each roll can assist in increasing that motivation. Is it easy? Of course not, but it is possible. Thanks for reading and commenting.
Leanne Regalla says
Great post, Lynn. So true. I’ve found time blocking (blocking off my schedule) and the Pomodoro technique to be really helpful to me. Plus, just delegating more. It’s not always complete time wasters I fight, but non-value added activities that also need to get done. And stuff like cooking and laundry. 😛
Lynn Silva says
You’re 100% correct Leanne! Perhaps I should’ve talked about navigating mom mode into the post as well. ; ) I completely relate to what you call ‘non-value activities’ because they certainly are never ending, yet very important. It’s all the more reason to nail this ‘boss mode’ versus ’employee mode’ thing down. Thanks so much for reading and commenting.
Raspal Seni says
Hi Lynn,
I never knew or even realized we all had a boss inside too! But I do know, we have a controller or a master. Just never thought in the boss and employee way.
Some nice tips and I love the 50 minute work and 10-20 minute break. 🙂
I recently started using focus booster and I seem to like it, especially the ticking sound it makes.
I had also tried another technique recently after reading it on Daily Blog Tips.
What you do is make a list of things you want to do. Then spend just 5 minutes on each and rotate, that is, do the next thing for 5 minutes. Then, stop and start the third thing. In the next cycle, do each for 10 minutes, next cycle for 15 minutes.
I liked doing this and even included a one minute meditation every 15 minutes or so. I fel I did a lot more than I usually do. I used focus booster set to the amount of time I wanted to work on each project.
Lynn Silva says
You’re right Raspal, I do have a master that most of the time, I don’t give enough credit to. I also never realized how difficult my own self can be to manage until I started freelancing. lol. I like your idea of rotating things in small time increments and am thinking that I should do something like this for those daily mundane tasks that I have a tendency to neglect. Thanks for a great tip, and for taking the time to comment. : )
Nida Sea says
Wonderful post, Lynn! I like all your tips for being the boss and employee. I know I took advantage of being ‘free’ from having to report to anyone. Well, that was until I learned I had to report to myself, at the very least. It really can be a vicious cycle!
Lynn Silva says
Yes Nida, I remember that initial ‘free’ feeling when I initially left my job. Then, that ‘free’ feeling turned into absolute inertia. I didn’t have any self-discipline and found myself going in circles. That’s when I realized I was going to have to be both boss and employee. I still struggle because I’m not perfect, but navigating between the two has worked thus far. Thanks for commenting. : )
Kyle Dunn says
Great article Lynn, biggest issue I have is I have never coped well with micro-managers, and my internal boss has some nasty tendencies in that direction towards me 🙂 oddly I’m a very hands off manager to others because I don’t like telling people what to do but that’s a whole other issue. So I find that I’ve had to shift this paradigm a little to make it work for me, but all of your tips are still very valid. Thank you
Lauren Tharp, BAFB Community Manager says
Glad you’re learning to not be so hard on yourself, Kyle. 😉
I find that being extremely organized gives me the ability to work more “freely.” (As odd as that might sound). If all of my files/e-mails/notes/etc. are “managed” then I don’t have to “manage” me as much.
I guess it’s a trial & error process for every freelancers, eh? We all have to learn how to be the best boss to/for ourselves.
Thanks for stopping by!
Lynn Silva says
Hi Kylie,
What you’re referring to is balance, and THAT is the whole idea. When you find your boss self being nasty to your employee self, try to reverse it and treat your ’employee’ self more like you would treat actual employees under you. If that doesn’t work, picture talking to me, or talking to someone you really admire and treat yourself as you would them in the situation. I tend to be very hard on myself too…so if I actually picture someone else when handling the ’employee’ side of me, this usually works for me. You have a very exciting future coming up really soon as I understand so just remember to be a good ‘boss’ and a good ’employee’ to yourself and you will do amazing things!
Neil Eldred says
Great post Lynn! I’ve found planning your next day is vital to being productive. If I don’t know what my first task is I’ll spend hours brainstorming and reading blog posts. Good idea to plan your work sessions with built in breaks. I tend to keep plowing through till my brain implodes and I can’t work. I’ll start trying the 50 minute sessions tomorrow. Thanks for the tip.
Lauren Tharp, BAFB Community Manager says
I hear you, Neil! I’d be lost without my dayplanner.
I actually have a list of priorities when it comes to my clients, as well. Because sometimes I’ll be working on several projects at once and my brain will spaz out and suddenly forget how to prioritize. It goes from “This is the most important and should be done first” to “EVERYTHING is the most important! EVERYTHING needs to get done right NOW!” (Stupid brain).
So I have a list of my clients — in order of importance — taped to my wall. That way, if my brain goes into panic mode, I just consult my list!
Anyway, enough about me. Thank YOU for stopping by! 😀
Lynn Silva says
Hi Neil! : )
I do the exact same thing if I don’t have my day planned out. I use it as an excuse to fiddle around and end up spending two hours having done nothing that relates to ‘income producing’ activity! If the 50 minute thing is too long, you can try the Pomodoro Technique…which is 25 minute intervals. This will break you in slowly, however I find that for writing, my brain doesn’t actually wake up until I’m 15 minutes into it…that’s why I call it ‘in the zone.’ So if I quit at 25 minutes, I’ve only really gotten 10 minutes of focused writing done. So Pomodoro only if you can’t seem to sit for 50 minutes straight and gradually work up.
Lauren, I can totally relate to your ‘EVERYTHING’ list as I do the same thing. That’s the awesome part about having the day planned out because if I get into that ‘overwhelmed’ state where EVERYTHING has to be done right now, I just look at my planner.
Either way Neil, you are an amazing writer and I know you’ll figure it out. Thanks so much for commenting.
Kelly Boyer Sagert says
I think it can also help if you know other self employed people. My father owned a funeral home the entire time I was growing up, so I was fortunate enough to witness his self discipline. Point being, befriending other freelancers/self employed can also be a source of support and motivation.
Great post!
Lauren Tharp, BAFB Community Manager says
Very true, Kelly! My parents are both freelancers and I think seeing them go through the “Feast or Famine” cycle my entire life helped prepare me for it in my own career.
Thanks for reading!
Lynn Silva says
Yes Kelly I agree too! I learn the most from rejections, and from other freelancers. But there’s also something else to having support from other freelancers…it’s the support they provide because they’ve been there and know exactly how it feels, what to say and how to get through it. It’s also one more reason why I love communities like BAFB. Thanks for stopping by and taking the time to comment.
D Kendra Franceso says
I wish I’d known at least one freelancer/self-employed person while growing up. I might not have been so terrified to begin, or so late in my life for beginning a business.
Ah well. I might not have understood or appreciated it then. All things happen in their own time, yes?
Kerry Congdon says
Ohh my gosh, Lynn, are you spying on me??? lol. Seriously, fantastic post! I am so guilty of this, so guess what? I just wrote down my major “to-dos” for tomorrow and hopefully I will make my “boss” proud. Great tips!
Lynn Silva says
LOL, no spying Kerry, I promise…but maybe it’s just that ‘great minds think alike?’ : ) Thanks for commenting and I’m glad to hear that it helped.
MJ says
Thank you, Lynn! Awesome advice that I needed.
I’m so busy making sure my kids’ schedule is on track, I lose sight of mine. Between homeschooling, running after my toddler, and all the other wife/mom duties, my brain is being pulled in a million directions!
I will definitely be using these tips to help me focus in on ME and my work. 🙂
Lynn Silva says
MJ, I really truly empathize with having kids in the mix. I’m a single parent and sometimes I want to pull my hair out. The only tips I can give you on this is that I take huge advantage of ‘quiet times,’ I continuously create quiet activities for them to do that won’t break my concentration and I involve them in my work! Yes, I know that sounds ridiculous, but it works! My 11 year old helps me with Facebook and Twitter and hunts down images for me. My 8 year old matches my Google calendar to my purse calendar and color codes it for me. They both do filing as well. By involving them, they better understand and are more willing to adhere to ‘quiet times.’ Take your time, and don’t be hard on yourself. You’ll find a flow that works…all you have to do is keep trying. : ) If you ever get stuck or just want to vent, don’t hesitate to email me. Whatever you do, don’t give up! You’ve got this!
MJ says
Hi Lynn!
For some reason this never went to my email, and I just happened to see it following a referrer link from my blog. lol
I totally empathize with *you*! I was a single mom for 11 years and trying to finish my degree during most of those years.
And it doesn’t sound ridiculous at all. I have my toddler help me count my beads when I’m getting them ready to list on Etsy. Great counting practice! And she likes to point out and name all the colors, too. 🙂
Thank you for the offer! I will definitely take you up on that!
Willi Morris says
This is just oodles of awesome Lynn. I am giving myself a break for a couple of days after an intense vacation but still staying in productive mode. These are good tips for a serious butt kicking.
Lynn Silva says
I love your saying Willi…so adorable. : ) You made a really good point…to give yourself a break…as in not be too hard on yourself. When I’m too hard on myself…I tend to become more sidetracked and make even more mistakes. It’s all about balance and self-discipline. The awesome part, is if you have none, like I had when I started…it’s still possible to develop over time. Thanks for taking the time to comment and stay productive! : )
Patrick says
I was just arguing (with myself) about this last night! It’s way too easy to get sucked into Facebook feeds and YouTube chains… Before you know it the day is over and I feel like I wasted it (because I did). And then it happens again…
Lauren Tharp, BAFB Community Manager says
I find that it’s really easy to feel like I’ve been “busy” just because I’ve been sitting at my desk/using my computer. Bleh…
Lynn Silva says
Hi Patrick! : )
Yes, it does happen again and again…it’s a cycle. The very first thing I did was begin planning out my day the day before. As long as I do that, even when my employee side is trying to rebel and sidetrack, I can just look at my list and get back on track. : ) And remember, there’s tricks in the post that I use to get me back on track when I’ve started my days out goofing off. It’s kind of like that saying, ‘It’s never too late…’ (to be productive) : ) Thanks for commenting. : )
Diana says
Great post, Lynn! You introduce a whole new perspective… I used to have the employee-self and boss-self getting into fights for so long – after reading your post, i know why 🙂
Like Kyle Dunn (a previous comment on this post) i too don;t like miro-managers and my inner boss used to be like that! So i fired her LOL
Now i find the best source of motivation and encouragement to sit and just do the work is in a totally different realm. I just remind myself how much i like my freedom; how i can simply go ride my bike on a Wednesday afternoon while 9-to-5 employees are stuck in the office; or how i am not limited to a 2 week (or less) vacation for the whole year; and so on. It pretty quickly smacks sense into me and i just roll my sleeves and get working.
Apart from the inner-boss angel, all your tips for time management, motivation and encouragement are true and valid to me, too – especially the time planning one. I plan not only the next day, i tend to do it for the week – i think every freelancer should do it for success 🙂
Lauren Tharp, BAFB Community Manager says
Haha. Glad you’re learning to be kinder to yourself, Diana! 😉
Hopefully we can all be “boss angel”s to ourselves.
Lynn Silva says
Hi Diana! : )
You made SUCH an awesome point!!!! What better motivation than pure freedom! When we get overwhelmed, sometimes we forget the many advantages to being freelance writers/bloggers! I’m all for putting a heavy dose of gratitude in when lacking motivation. Thanks for making such a wonderful, motivating point! : )
Corey Pemberton says
Fantastic tips, Lynn! Thanks for putting them together.
One thing you mentioned that’s already made a huge difference in my productivity is simply planning your next day before you go to bed. I like to put a star next to the most important task I want to get done the next morning. That way I can take care of it right after I wake up; it’s a great way to focus on the important stuff and build momentum!
Lauren Tharp, BAFB Community Manager says
I mark my most important task with a star too! haha.
Thanks for commenting!
Lynn Silva says
Hi Corey! : )
Yes! Momentum is the key! When you immediately accomplish one thing on your ‘to do’ list, it just sets the tone for a very productive day. It also gives me that confidence boost I so greatly need some days…like when you check for responses to queries and get nothing but crickets! By accomplishing a task, especially an income producing one, it takes the sting out and motivates me to continue pushing forward. : )
Jenn Flynn-Shon says
Lynn this post is fantastic! So many great tips for ways to stick to a schedule…or at the very least keep working in small chunks of time all day long. I love the 50 minute idea. Going to try that today.
Plus you’ve inspired my Friday post so thank you very much!
Lauren Tharp, BAFB Community Manager says
Glad you liked Lynn’s post! Did you write your post, by the way…? If so, we’d love to read it!
Lynn Silva says
Hi Jenn! : )
I’m so honored that it brought inspiration. I’d LOVE to read your post! Will you send me the link? Thanks so much for reading and commenting! : )
D Kendra Franceso says
Marian Paroo, the librarian:
“No, please. Not tonight. Maybe tomorrow.”
Professor Harold Hill:
“You pile up enough tomorrows, and you’ll find you are left with nothing but a lot of empty yesterdays. I don’t know about you, but I’d like to make today worth remembering.”
(The Music Man, 1962)
Sophie Lizard says
PERFECT quote!
Lauren Tharp, BAFB Community Manager says
Love it! 🙂
Lynn Silva says
Hi Kendra! : )
“No, please. Not tonight. Maybe tomorrow.” This is almost EXACTLY what my ’employee’ self says sometimes!!! Great quotes, both of them. And yes, the entire idea is to make every minute worth it, because each and every one of us is worth it. Thanks for the quotes! : )
Hiten says
Hi Lynn,
Excellent post, indeed!
I like the way you explained out ‘boss self’ and ’employee self’. I think it can be really useful to separate these two selves as a motivator. As you say, we would never a tell a boss at the office that we will do something tomorrow. We can apply the same principle with our ‘boss self’ and ensure we get done what the boss wants!
Thank you.
Lauren Tharp, BAFB Community Manager says
So glad Lynn’s post struck a chord with you, Hiten! 🙂 Thanks for commenting.
Lynn Silva says
Hi Hiten! : )
The funny thing is, my ’employee self’ still tries to use this excuse! That’s why I came up with the post. The more I grow, the more I realize that self-discipline requires self-respect. This is one thing I wish I just automatically had when I started! Thanks for commenting. : )